65 Roses?....A beautiful way of saying Cystic Fibrosis, however does not make CF any more beautiful. My wish is to be standing untarnished, unbreakable, breathing easily.... A blog that is about my day to day life, as well as trying to cope with my illness Cystic Fibrosis. There will be no hold backs just me...out in the open, hope you enjoy! xXx

Tuesday 6 December 2011

Nose-Lung Its all the same here...

Following my last post i have been trying daily to add in at least 1 more physio session a day...the verdict is exhaustion!!

My sleep pattern is all over the place at the moment, i am again getting very little solid sleep, so i just doze throughout the day and night. Between sleeping im focusing my attention on Physio...I'm going to try and explain how it feels so excuse me if its just rambling on....

Most people are more likely suffered with a cold or flu instead of a full blown chest infection..so imagine the last cold you had, or watch the cold and flu remedy adverts. You will always see the peson with a red sore nose which they are trying to blow.
Do you remember that feeling of not getting any air through the nasal passage and getting more and more frustrated with each blow as it becomes harder, tenser, sorer through the pressure inside building?
Transfer these feeling to your lungs. You can feel they are full to the brim with gunk, you can feel it on your hand when you hold your chest. Its bubbling away gurgling against your hand almost like a baby kicking in the womb feels. As you breath in it sounds like you are blowing through a straw in to fluid, a loud bubbling sound.
At the end of the bubbling there is a crackle like the old sweet stardust popping on your tongue. I'm taking short sharp breaths as the air will not move past the mucus to the lower airways, I'm trying to pull some air in to my lungs as the force of air will rattle the mucus off the lungs lining making it easier to move.
Only its not moving i dont have enough strength to get a good enough flow of air so im only breathing in to the top part of my lungs so the mucus below it is just stuck solid.
The nebulisers im taking designed to thin the mucus aren't doing the job properly because i cant breath it deep enough in to the airways. I'm just coughing and coughing where my airways are inflamed and sore like the guys nose in the adverts.
My back and shoulders are tense and the muscles are aching. My stomach feels raw from the retching i cant be sick though as my stomach is empty iv not eaten anything yet.

Its so hard to do this over and over each day, and it feels there is no end in sight when your team are telling you they are full and have no bed for you, they cant even give a rough idea on how long the wait will be, will it be later today, tomorrow, next week, i dont know how long i can 'just cope'? im so tired after one session i sleep then food and exercise gets forgotten about. Its just a daily cycle until they get a bed.

I'm going out for dinner with my friend tonight so im going to stop physio now and have a sleep so i feel energized for dinner tonight, im very much looking forward to seeing Jennie and stuffing a steak down my mouth :D Lets just hope im not to breathless to eat again as im so hungry.....

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